Saturday, August 26, 2006

I am recovering from a painting high that just struck me and motivated my time in my studio. I managed to pull the first layer of an acrylic mixed media piece out of my weary soul. It is a eve with loud music and strong emotions. Manic in their range.

I spent my day with the men I work for wandering around the Portland Sidewalk Art Festival. It was really enjoyable but I must say that I did find the lack of representation of mixed media work a bit disconcerting. There were a couple of wonderful mixed media artist represented but the majority of the art work there were pretty things. Not that there is anything wrong with pretty things, however they bore me.

So here I am another night home in my lonliness. My husband at work, my friends otherwise occupied and my energy level low, anxiety high. Not a particularly comfortable feeling, unfortunately the remedy of ice cream and pizza is not doing a damn thing to pacify me tonight.

I can't put my finger on what I want.

Vivid dreams trying to send me a message and whether I am blocked by fear, laziness or pure exhaustion is hard to say. So much of the pieces of me that I abandoned long ago are coming back to make me complete once again. And with this overwhelming process comes a great deal of isolation.

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3 comments:

kerry said...

i agree and recognize what you seem to be saying about a healing process leaving you with a sense of isolation. i just wanted to thank you for your words, because they help me understand myself too. take care.

anup.777 said...

Dunno what to say buddy ... We are here for you ... hoping and praying that you recover ompletely soon!! Hugs ....

Jana B said...

Sometimes healing seems to require isolation. It stinks... but it's worth it.